Why this blog is already totally screwed

So you know how everyone these days has a blog? Well, I must be running a fever or about to die of tuberculosis because I totally have one now too. Which is weird because I always said I would never get one. For some reason the thought of publicly sharing the details of my life makes me want to vom. And that is so totally hypocritical because I'm a bit of a blog fiend. I love reading blogs. I love stalking random strangers on the blogosphere and pretending that they are my real life friends. I love reading about other people's details.

Having my own blog makes me all vomy probably because this shit is wicked stressful. Like, what am I supposed to talk about? What do I want people to get from my blog? What's the aim? Ha, well, hell if I know. I guess we'll all be surprised. And secondly, how will I constantly be funny and deep and relatable and not a total freak ass like the bloggers that I seriously love and who give me a massive dose of the jealousies?? And, there's the whole naming business too. Which is probably what makes me vomy the most because, hello, like every original thing I can think of is already taken because apparently everyone except my 75 year old gradma has a blog. Except she probably has one too. And now I'm totally screwed because I'm going to end up with a blog name that completely sucks ballz and everyone will laugh at me like the time I threw up outside the cafeteria in second grade. See, wicked stressful.

So, the point of all of this is to not be surprised if I change the name every other day. Or if I update every six months like the time in junior high when I tried to keep a diary and all it ended up in was repeatedly signing my name over and over because I couldn't think of anything to write and in the event that I do write something, it probably won't be at all coherent because I'll probably be drunk because of all of the stress that this blog will give me will force me to drink. So basically this blog is going to make me an alcoholic. Not that I really need help with that anyway.

I'm pretty sure this makes me the worst blogger in the history of ever.

Hi, I'm Chelsea and I'm an alcoholic.